Is Time Apart A Good Thing?

Danny and I spent almost all day yesterday apart. Not that we were upset or anything...we just went our separate ways for the day. I had errands to run and he had chores around the yard to take care of. After lunch Danny headed to his woodworking shop and I went to the craft room. As far as I can tell we both had a fabulous day and ended it together watching movies.

His work schedule is really taxing - he works eight days in a row and then gets a 3-day weekend, works two days and has one more day off. Then it starts all over again. It works really well for the company, but can make it difficult for me to schedule time with my husband.

I used to think that every waking moment of that 3-day weekend needed to be spent together. I felt like I was missing out on Danny's time during that long week, so I deserved to make up for it. There were several weekends that I was severely disappointed because he just wanted to nap and watch television and recover from those long days at the funeral home. All I was thinking about was reconnecting and spending as much time together as humanly possible.

However, we are two completely different people. We love many of the same things but there are times we need to be able to pursue separate passions. For example: I am not particularly fond of the sawdust and noises in the garage, but that is where Danny's creativity flourishes. On the other hand, decorating paper with stickers and stamps isn't exactly Danny's cup of tea, while I can stay in there for hours preserving our memories and making cards.

So how important is time apart? Danny gets time to relax and rejuvenate while I get some extra time to work on my favorite projects. We can eat on our own schedules, get some fun things accomplished and still meet back up at the end of the day. And my favorite part are those little pecks on the cheek as he passes my chair.

Yes, my time with my husband is incredibly important and comes before everything except my time with God. But that time is worthless if we're in bitter frames of mind over it. The evening is fabulous when we've spent the day doing the things we love. Then we can truly make the most of our time because we haven't denied each other anything or forced anything. We can simply enjoy the relationship we've been blessed with - because we're allowing each other to be individuals in an incredible relationship.

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